Thursday, June 16, 2005
Be happy. Be good to yourself. I have to constantly remind myself of this. Nic said so. He said I should say it 10 times into the mirror every morning before I start my day. I want to be happy. This is a personal promise I made to myself.
If you think about it, being happy or not is actually just a thin line, as is with most things in life - love/ hate, life/death etc. Nic told me he was devastated when he broke up with his gf of 4 years due to compatibility issues. (But he quickly assured me he's over her now. Anyway, it was like more than a decade ago. He only has place in his heart for his big dolly now.) And he was that way for almost 3 months, until one day he woke up and decided to stop being unhappy. It's that easy, he said.
Thank you Dear and I can't thank you enough. Thank you for shinning light into my otherwise insipid life and for pointing me in the right direction. I really appreciate it. That's why you fully deserve the Birthday Gift of the Century, speaking of which, I have to get my arse down to doing it soon. Ah, and I realised yesterday an ipod may have something to do in the grand scheme of this Gift. Someone help me figure all these out please!!
Nic has been having the time of his life for the last few nights. I have been doing mind- (and other body parts below the waist *winks*) blowing things to him. I finally understand the old wisdom of never saying never. I won't say I like giving blowjobs (that will be pushing it a little) but at least now I don't hate it. And it really makes me happy to see him happy. It's a really joyful thing to do something that makes someone you love happy. It's more than this actually. While I don't like the feeling or connotation of subjugation that comes with it and Nic is really sensitive to this (by refraining from pushing my head into his crotch or pulling my hair or ears like they were handles), I guess I like to be in a position to control when he comes and how intense it is. It's very satisfying, not to mention empowering. Ok this is sounding to be like a sex blog.
The romantic front is doing really well this week. He showers me with a lot of attention. I just can't help smiling when he's around. And he said he can't help smiling too when he sees me. It's nice to feel treasured and wanted. Thank you for making me feel attractive and desirable again.
If you think about it, being happy or not is actually just a thin line, as is with most things in life - love/ hate, life/death etc. Nic told me he was devastated when he broke up with his gf of 4 years due to compatibility issues. (But he quickly assured me he's over her now. Anyway, it was like more than a decade ago. He only has place in his heart for his big dolly now.) And he was that way for almost 3 months, until one day he woke up and decided to stop being unhappy. It's that easy, he said.
Thank you Dear and I can't thank you enough. Thank you for shinning light into my otherwise insipid life and for pointing me in the right direction. I really appreciate it. That's why you fully deserve the Birthday Gift of the Century, speaking of which, I have to get my arse down to doing it soon. Ah, and I realised yesterday an ipod may have something to do in the grand scheme of this Gift. Someone help me figure all these out please!!
Nic has been having the time of his life for the last few nights. I have been doing mind- (and other body parts below the waist *winks*) blowing things to him. I finally understand the old wisdom of never saying never. I won't say I like giving blowjobs (that will be pushing it a little) but at least now I don't hate it. And it really makes me happy to see him happy. It's a really joyful thing to do something that makes someone you love happy. It's more than this actually. While I don't like the feeling or connotation of subjugation that comes with it and Nic is really sensitive to this (by refraining from pushing my head into his crotch or pulling my hair or ears like they were handles), I guess I like to be in a position to control when he comes and how intense it is. It's very satisfying, not to mention empowering. Ok this is sounding to be like a sex blog.
The romantic front is doing really well this week. He showers me with a lot of attention. I just can't help smiling when he's around. And he said he can't help smiling too when he sees me. It's nice to feel treasured and wanted. Thank you for making me feel attractive and desirable again.
# posted by Oddball @ 8:39 PM 
