Tuesday, June 28, 2005
My birthday present was taken away from me, by my dad. Sounds so juvenile, doesn't it? Well it did happen, on Sunday.
Nic finally decided that he's going to get me this bag from LV I had been eyeing for the longest time as a birthday present. It's a little expensive no doubt (almost $2K), but he doesn't really spend alot on me on frivolous gifts. I am not that sort of gf who expects nice gifts from cartier or tiffys or bvlgari from time to time, and neither is he that sort who likes to surprise me this way. So as he puts it, he can 'well afford a bigger budget for important occasions like birthday or christmas.' And frankly, spending $2k on a gf isn't too extravagant anyway. I have seen my other gfs getting even more expensive gifts from their bfs.
So we went down in the afternoon to get the bag, and I left the boutique a very satisfied and happy girl. In the evening, we went back to my parents' for an early birthday celebration for me. Nothing fancy, it's just a home-cooked meal with my family and extended family. And somehow, it came up during conversation that Nic had generously given me a $2k-LV. My sisters and cousins started the ooh-ing and ahh-ing.
Nic, 'Well she deserves it.' He smiled and winked at me. (He meant this from the bottom of his heart)
One cousin said in jest, 'I am sure she definitely does. And he's gonna expect a lot more in return, Mich.'
Nic jokingly remarked, 'I sure do.'
And everyone roared in laughter.
And I thought we were all old enough to take such innuendos (and even such mild ones, really) in good fun. Well apparently my dad didn't think so, and he was quite upset. He pulled me into the room, and told me how much the above seemingly innocuous exchange bothered him. And Nic's wink didn't escape his notice. Then he wrote me a check in the amount of $2000 and asked me to hand it to Nic when we got back.
Dad,' So who does he think he is? And what does he take you for? Just give him the check. If my daughter wants a $2k bag, I can afford to buy it for her.'
Of course, I declined his check. I wanted to say something in defense of Nic, in defense of myself, to explain that everything was said in jest and in good fun. I wanted to tell him he over-reacted, he should just loosen up. I wanted to tell him what he said was an insult to both Nic and me. But I said nothing, which in retrospect was a bad move, cos he might very well had thought that I agreed with him. I guess I was too shocked and upset to say anything. So I just told him I would return Nic the money myself. If I so desperately wanted a 2K bag, I damn well could afford it myself too. Just that it's so much better when you receive something you always wanted as a gift from someone who was considerate enough to buy it for you. And I walked out of the room.
So as you might have guessed, my whole evening was screwed. Once Nic and I were alone in the car, I immediately started sobbing uncontrollably.
I insisted he take my check for the bag. He insisted he won't.
Him,' I won't take your money, sweetie. It's your birthday present.'
How could a dad think this way about his own daughter? It's repulsive. It was not so much me having to pay for my own present as his rationale that upset me.
Him, 'Honey, he's your dad so I really don't know what to say. I think he's making a big deal out of this. It's just a birthday present.'
Me,' Just take the money. I already promised him I would pay you back.'
Him, 'Screw the promise. It's your dad you are upset with, don't take it out on me, Mich.'
I think I will still try to find a way to get him to accept at least 50% of the money. At least, it will make me feel better and I won't feel like I have broken my promise to my dad.
Nic finally decided that he's going to get me this bag from LV I had been eyeing for the longest time as a birthday present. It's a little expensive no doubt (almost $2K), but he doesn't really spend alot on me on frivolous gifts. I am not that sort of gf who expects nice gifts from cartier or tiffys or bvlgari from time to time, and neither is he that sort who likes to surprise me this way. So as he puts it, he can 'well afford a bigger budget for important occasions like birthday or christmas.' And frankly, spending $2k on a gf isn't too extravagant anyway. I have seen my other gfs getting even more expensive gifts from their bfs.
So we went down in the afternoon to get the bag, and I left the boutique a very satisfied and happy girl. In the evening, we went back to my parents' for an early birthday celebration for me. Nothing fancy, it's just a home-cooked meal with my family and extended family. And somehow, it came up during conversation that Nic had generously given me a $2k-LV. My sisters and cousins started the ooh-ing and ahh-ing.
Nic, 'Well she deserves it.' He smiled and winked at me. (He meant this from the bottom of his heart)
One cousin said in jest, 'I am sure she definitely does. And he's gonna expect a lot more in return, Mich.'
Nic jokingly remarked, 'I sure do.'
And everyone roared in laughter.
And I thought we were all old enough to take such innuendos (and even such mild ones, really) in good fun. Well apparently my dad didn't think so, and he was quite upset. He pulled me into the room, and told me how much the above seemingly innocuous exchange bothered him. And Nic's wink didn't escape his notice. Then he wrote me a check in the amount of $2000 and asked me to hand it to Nic when we got back.
Dad,' So who does he think he is? And what does he take you for? Just give him the check. If my daughter wants a $2k bag, I can afford to buy it for her.'
Of course, I declined his check. I wanted to say something in defense of Nic, in defense of myself, to explain that everything was said in jest and in good fun. I wanted to tell him he over-reacted, he should just loosen up. I wanted to tell him what he said was an insult to both Nic and me. But I said nothing, which in retrospect was a bad move, cos he might very well had thought that I agreed with him. I guess I was too shocked and upset to say anything. So I just told him I would return Nic the money myself. If I so desperately wanted a 2K bag, I damn well could afford it myself too. Just that it's so much better when you receive something you always wanted as a gift from someone who was considerate enough to buy it for you. And I walked out of the room.
So as you might have guessed, my whole evening was screwed. Once Nic and I were alone in the car, I immediately started sobbing uncontrollably.
I insisted he take my check for the bag. He insisted he won't.
Him,' I won't take your money, sweetie. It's your birthday present.'
How could a dad think this way about his own daughter? It's repulsive. It was not so much me having to pay for my own present as his rationale that upset me.
Him, 'Honey, he's your dad so I really don't know what to say. I think he's making a big deal out of this. It's just a birthday present.'
Me,' Just take the money. I already promised him I would pay you back.'
Him, 'Screw the promise. It's your dad you are upset with, don't take it out on me, Mich.'
I think I will still try to find a way to get him to accept at least 50% of the money. At least, it will make me feel better and I won't feel like I have broken my promise to my dad.
# posted by Oddball @ 10:59 AM 
